Talking or Tapping? How Technology Can Boost — or Block — Your Child’s Language Growth
Children learn to speak by hearing speech — not swipes. But the right tech, used wisely, can support language, not silence it. A child’s brain is wired for words. From birth, they’re tuning into the rhythm, tone and melody of language. And by the time they reach Reception, their vocabulary size is one of the strongest predictors of school success. But in today’s screen-saturated world, many children are hearing fewer words and speaking less. 📉 One UK study found that toddlers heard 4 million fewer words by age 3 if regularly exposed to heavy screen time. Why? Because screens can replace conversations — rather than stimulate them. 📱 The Double-Edged Sword of Digital Technology isn’t the villain. But it needs a purposeful place in a child’s day. Technology can block language when: It’s used passively (e.g., background TV, YouTube autoplay) It replaces live, responsive conversations It dominates mealtimes, play, car journeys or bedtime routines But tech can also boost language when: It’s interactive and co-viewed with an adult It encourages turn-taking, naming, predicting and discussing It builds on a child’s real-world interests The difference? Who is involved, how it’s used, and what happens afterwards. 🧠 The Language-Development Superpowers Children NeedChildren need: Serve-and-return conversations(“You said ‘moo’ – yes, the cow goes moo! What else is in the field?”) Rich, descriptive vocabulary(“That’s a shiny, golden leaf – let’s count how many we find!”) Opportunities to ask and answer questions(“What do you think will happen next?” “Why did that happen?”) Responsive adults who model speechNot robots or autoplay cartoons. Language grows in relationships, not isolation. 7 Real-World Tips to Nurture Language in a Digital Age Talk More Than You Type Narrate your day. Let children hear the rhythm of speech: “I’m chopping carrots. Orange and crunchy. What comes next?” Children don’t just need talking at them — they need talking with. Use Screens Together – Not as a Babysitter. Make tech social. Ask: “What do you see?” “How do you think they feel?” “Can you tell me what happens next?” The tech isn’t the teacher — you are. Ban Background TV Even if no one’s watching, background noise disrupts focus and play — and adults speak less when it’s on. Keep play and conversation screen-free, especially in shared spaces. Swap Swiping for Storytelling Story apps aren’t a replacement for real books or bedtime stories. Let children hear stories with: Intonation Expression Pauses for questions It’s not just reading — it’s a relationship. Encourage Pretend Play Role-play builds narrative structure, vocabulary and creativity. Whether it’s playing shops, pirates or doctors, children use rich language to bring their ideas to life. Play Sound and Listening Games Try: “I spy something that starts with S” Sound walks (what can we hear outside?) “Simon Says” for following instructions Simple games = powerful listening skills. Model Curious Conversations Ask open-ended questions: “What do you notice?”“Why do you think that happened?”“How did that make you feel?” Children absorb language from those who model curiosity. For Parents: Focus on Connection, Not Correction Children don’t need grammar lessons – they need opportunities to express themselves, be listened to, and gently expanded. If a child says: “Me goed to the park.” You can say: “Yes, you went to the park! What did you do there?” Correct through modelling, not criticism. For Nurseries and Early Years Practitioners: Conversations Come Before Worksheets In settings where school readiness is a hot topic, don’t default to formal learning. Instead: Give space for small-group storytimes Use everyday routines for rich talk (e.g., snacktime, tidy-up) Train staff in sustained shared thinking — those magical moments when an adult and child share a conversation that deepens thinking and vocabulary It’s the dialogue, not the device, that grows the brain. Don’t Panic – Talk! Children don’t need constant chatter or screen bans. They need language-rich relationships, playful exploration, and moments of wonder. So whether you’re a parent, practitioner, or both: Let’s make real-world, real-voice conversation the centrepiece of early years learning. Because before a child can read and write, they must listen and speak. 🎒 Ready to Grow a Talkative, Confident School Starter? The Sue Atkins School Readiness Toolkit gives you the resources to: ✅ Spark conversations✅ Boost listening and language✅ Balance tech time with real talk Perfect for homes, nurseries and classrooms preparing little ones for a big world. 👉 Download the toolkit here Let’s raise confident communicators — one word at a time.
Log Off, Tune In: Raising Emotionally Ready Kids Before Reception
Emotional literacy is a bigger predictor of school success than knowing letters or numbers – and it starts long before the classroom. When we talk about school readiness, we often focus on academic basics – counting to 10, recognising letters, writing their name But the quiet superpower that often gets overlooked?Emotional regulation. A child’s ability to recognise, manage and express their feelings is a stronger predictor of school success than early reading skills. And in today’s digital world – where swiping is easier than sitting with discomfort – building that inner resilience matters more than ever. What Is Emotional Regulation – And Why Does It Matter? Emotional regulation is a child’s ability to: These are the skills that allow children to thrive in group settings, solve problems, and form secure relationships with peers and teachers. Without them, even the brightest child can struggle in the classroom. How Screens Are Short-Circuiting Emotional Growth We live in a world of instant gratification. When children get bored, frustrated, or upset, it’s tempting to hand over a device. And sometimes, that’s okay. But when screens become a child’s primary coping tool, they don’t get to practise the skills they’ll need in real life: Digital devices soothe the symptom, not the system. And if we’re not careful, we raise children who can swipe through apps but struggle to sit with themselves. 6 Ways to Build Emotional Resilience Before School Starts Whether you’re a parent, teacher or nursery practitioner, you can help children build the emotional toolkit they’ll carry into Reception – and beyond. 1. Name the Feeling Start with emotional literacy.Help children put words to what they’re experiencing: “You’re really cross because the game stopped.”“That’s a sad face – did something feel unfair?” This helps reduce overwhelm and builds self-awareness. 2. Use Storybooks as Emotional Mirrors Children relate to characters. Use books where characters feel frustrated, worried, jealous, left out – and talk about it. Ask: Stories open doors to deep emotional conversations. 3. Practise Calming Strategies When Calm Teach children what helps them feel better – not just in the moment, but before the meltdown. Try: Rehearse these tools when they’re feeling good – not in the middle of a meltdown. 4. Let Them Feel It – Don’t Rush to Fix It When children are upset, it’s tempting to distract or fix it quickly – often with a screen. But sitting with them through it builds tolerance and connection: “It’s okay to be upset. I’m here with you. Take your time.” They learn that feelings pass – and they’re not alone. 5. Keep Screen Time Calm and Conscious Tech can be part of a balanced life – but not the crutch for every emotional wobble. 6. Model What You Want to See Children copy how we deal with stress.If we name our feelings (“I’m a bit tired today – I need a walk”) and use healthy strategies, they will too. We don’t need to be perfect. We just need to be real. For Parents: Regulate First, Then Educate You don’t need to rush into phonics and flashcards.If your child knows how to: Children can’t learn when they’re dysregulated. Emotional readiness is the real first lesson. For Nurseries and Professionals: Prioritise Feelings, Not Just Funding In early years settings, there’s often pressure to track learning outcomes. But emotional wellbeing must remain the priority. Give children: The most powerful ‘intervention’ is always connection. Let’s Raise Children Who Can Sit With Sadness and Celebrate Joy Children entering school today face a fast-paced world.We can’t protect them from every wobble — but we can equip them to handle life’s ups and downs with confidence and calm. So let’s put emotional resilience at the centre of school readiness.Because a child who can manage their emotions is a child who is ready to learn. 🎒 Want to Nurture Emotionally Resilient Children in a Screen-Saturated World? The Navigating the Digital Jungle School Readiness Toolkit is filled with printable resources and play-based activities to help children: ✅ Build emotional intelligence✅ Learn calming strategies✅ Navigate tech mindfully Whether you’re a parent, nursery, or early years professional, this toolkit gives you screen-savvy support with real-life emotional growth. 👉 Get it here and start the journey today
Switching Off – The Power of Digital Detox in the Early Years
Giving young minds the breathing space they need to grow, create, and connect. We live in a switched-on world. Notifications ping, videos autoplay, and information scrolls endlessly. For adults, this constant connectivity is exhausting.For young children, it’s not just exhausting — it’s developmentally disruptive. In the crucial early years, children need time and space to daydream, wonder, move, create, and connect without digital interruption.A digital detox isn’t a luxury. It’s a necessity. Let’s explore why switching off is so powerful for young children — and how parents, nurseries, teachers, and early years professionals can make it part of everyday life. Why Screen-Free Spaces Matter for Growing Minds Children’s brains develop at an astonishing speed in the first five years of life.During this window, neural pathways are built based on what children experience — and, importantly, what they don’t. Screen time crowds out vital opportunities for: When we flood children’s attention with constant digital input, we leave less room for these essential experiences.Switching off gives the brain breathing space to grow. The Science Behind the Need to Switch Off Research shows: Put simply: the less time spent in front of a screen, the more time young brains have to wire themselves for learning, resilience, and emotional intelligence. How to Create Everyday Digital Detox Moments You don’t have to ban technology completely.Small, intentional screen-free pockets throughout the day can have a huge impact. Here’s how: 1. Tech-Free Zones Designate certain areas as no-screen zones — for example: Children quickly learn to associate these places with real connection and real exploration. 2. Tech-Free Rituals Anchor screen-free time to daily routines.Example: These small habits build lasting expectations about balanced tech use. 3. Boredom Bravery When children say “I’m bored,” it’s tempting to offer a tablet.Instead, embrace boredom. Give them simple prompts: Teaching children to move through boredom builds patience, creativity, and self-motivation — skills they need for life. 4. Model Digital Balance Children learn more from what we do than what we say.Put your own phone away during playtime, meals, and conversations.Show that adults value being fully present too. Digital Detox at Nursery and School: Building It In Early years settings can support detox culture by: This isn’t about being anti-technology.It’s about being pro-child. The Magic That Happens When Screens Are Put Away When the screens go dark, something extraordinary lights up: In these moments, school readiness blooms naturally — because the foundations of learning, empathy, communication, and self-regulation are being laid, screen-free and full of life. Detoxing Today, Building Brilliance for Tomorrow Switching off isn’t about deprivation. It’s about giving children the rich, complex, human experiences their developing brains crave. By weaving digital detox moments into daily life — at home, in nurseries, and at school — we gift children something invaluable: the chance to grow up grounded, connected, creative, and ready for anything. Ready to prepare your child for school and life — without the overwhelm of tech? The ‘Navigating the Digital Jungle School Readiness Toolkit’ gives you simple, powerful strategies to build real-world skills, confidence, and curiosity in children aged 3–6. Packed with screen-free activity ideas, tech balance tips, expert advice, and ready-to-go resources, it’s your go-to guide for supporting happy, healthy school transitions in today’s digital world. Discover the toolkit that gives children (and adults!) the best start possible.Explore it here.
Sleep & Screens: Navigating the Digital Jungle at Bedtime 💤 📱
Sleep is the unsung hero of healthy development – yet in homes across the country, it’s under siege from glowing screens, pinging notifications, and endless scrolling. Whether it’s a toddler transfixed by cartoons or a teen watching TikToks past midnight, devices are distracting, stimulating, and interfering with one of the most essential parts of family life: a good night’s sleep. So how do we, as parents, navigate this part of the digital jungle? Let’s start by understanding why it matters – and then move to what we can do about it. Why Sleep Matters – At Every Age From babies to teenagers, sleep plays a critical role in: How Devices Disrupt Sleep Here’s what’s going on: What Parents Can Do – Practical Tips 1. Create a Digital CurfewSet a household rule that all devices are off at least an hour before bed – ideally longer for teens and toddlers alike. 2. Make Bedrooms Screen-Free ZonesCharge phones in the kitchen. Swap tablets for real books. Make the bedroom a place for rest, not reels. 3. Establish a Calm Bedtime RoutineWind-down time could include a warm bath, a story, gentle music, or journaling. Routine helps signal the brain that sleep is coming. 4. Model It YourselfChildren of all ages notice your habits. Try not to scroll while saying goodnight or check your phone during bedtime routines. Scripts to Start the Conversation These aren’t lectures. They’re calm, confident conversations that build connection, not conflict. For Toddlers & Young Children“Let’s tuck the tablet into bed too. It needs to rest so we can have more fun tomorrow!” For Primary School Kids“Screens are fun, but sleep is superpower fuel. Let’s put the tablet away now so your brain and body can grow strong while you sleep.” For Tweens“I know it’s tempting to sneak a scroll, but your brain deserves a break. Want to come up with a bedtime playlist or read together for a few minutes instead?” For Teens“I get that your phone helps you stay connected. But the science is clear – sleep is essential for your mood, memory, and mental health. How can we make this easier – maybe a charging spot downstairs?” A Final Thought Helping your child sleep better isn’t about being strict – it’s about being smart. In this part of the digital jungle, it’s not the lion we need to worry about, but the lure of one more video, one more scroll, one more level. Navigating this together, with empathy and consistency, can transform the bedtime battle into a bedtime bond.
Behind the Selfie: How Boys Shape Girls’ Social Media Struggles and Self-Esteem
While much of the conversation rightly focuses on the pressure social media puts on girls, it’s crucial not to leave boys out of the picture — because they’re not just observers, they’re part of the digital ecosystem too. 👀 Boys are watching, liking, sharing, commenting. They’re often the audience for the content girls post — and their reactions can either fuel the pressure or help change the culture. Boys can be both consumers and contributors to unrealistic standards and objectification online. 💬 What can we do as parents of boys? Teach empathy and media literacy earlyHelp boys understand how social media can distort reality — not just for them, but for their female peers. Talk about filters, likes, influencers, and how curated it all is. “Do you think that post shows real life? What might be happening behind the scenes?” Talk about respect, consent, and kindness onlineThis includes how they talk about girls, how they respond to posts, and how they treat others in group chats or DMs. “How would you feel if someone said that about your sister or your friend?” Challenge “locker room” cultureHelp them question toxic norms like rating girls, sharing private images, or making appearance-based jokes. Boys often go along with this for approval — but they need to know it’s okay to step out. Encourage emotional expressionBoys also suffer in silence. They’re often told to “man up” or suppress feelings, which can lead to internalised pressure, shame, or unhealthy digital habits (e.g., hiding behind gaming or consuming harmful content). Create a home culture where talking about feelings — and respecting others’ — is normal and encouraged. Model what healthy masculinity looks likeLet them see dads, uncles, teachers, and male role models talk kindly about women, own their mistakes, and show emotional maturity. 💡 In Short:Boys play a crucial role in either reinforcing or reshaping the digital norms that hurt girls — and themselves. As parents, we can raise boys who are not just kind and confident, but also aware, compassionate, and brave enough to challenge the crowd.
Why Does Social Media Affect Girls More Than Boys?
I was sent in this great question from an attendee on my recent Behind the Selfie: Girls, Social Media, and Self-Esteem Struggles Power Hour Webinar Why does social media seem to affect girls more than boys, I’m aware that there are wider issues in society that contribute but I’m curious to learn more, and what can we do for younger girls of primary school age to help foster a positive self-image? This is such an important question and it’s great that this parent is looking at both the impact of social media and the wider societal context. Here’s a breakdown of why social media often affects girls more than boys, and what we can do to support younger girls in primary school: Why social media affects girls more than boys: What we can do for younger girls (primary school age): Start early with body-positive messagesFocus on what bodies can do rather than what they look like. Celebrate strength, movement, creativity, and kindness. Avoid making appearance-related comments, even positive ones, the main focus of praise. Model self-compassion and media literacyBe aware of how you speak about your own body or other people’s appearance around children. Talk about how images online are often filtered or staged — and not always real life. Praise effort and character over looksCompliment qualities like bravery, curiosity, helpfulness, resilience, or creativity — not just cuteness or prettiness. Diverse books, toys, and role modelsSurround them with stories and images that show girls as scientists, adventurers, artists, and athletes. Representation matters. Digital delay where possibleDelay the introduction of platforms that are heavy on appearance and peer feedback. Focus instead on creative, collaborative, or curiosity-based digital experiences. Encourage offline hobbies and passionsHelp girls find joy in sports, art, drama, reading, nature — things that build confidence and identity outside of screens. Create a space for open conversationAsk how they feel about what they see online. Validate their emotions and help them think critically about social media. Equip them with phrases like: “That’s not real life,” “My worth isn’t measured in likes,” or “I’m enough just as I am.” Raising girls in a digital world comes with unique challenges — but also powerful opportunities. By staying curious, setting thoughtful boundaries, and nurturing confidence early on, we can help our daughters grow up feeling seen, valued, and strong in who they are — both online and off. Remember, you don’t have to be perfect — just present. And every little conversation, limit, and moment of connection adds up. Let’s keep championing balance, self-worth, and empathy — one small step (and scroll) at a time.
How to Say “No” Without Being the Bad Guy: Navigating Social Media Rules With Your Daughter
I was sent in this great question from an attendee on my recent Behind the Selfie: Girls, Social Media, and Self-Esteem Struggles Power Hour Webinar It’s such a common and totally understandable feeling — no one wants to be the “fun sponge” parent, especially when it’s something their child loves, and all their friends are doing. But setting boundaries doesn’t mean you’re the bad guy — it means you care. Here’s a way to reframe and respond: How to not be seen as the “bad guy” — and what to say: 1. Acknowledge her feelings first Start with empathy. Let her know you see her. Try saying: “I can see how much you love this, and I get that it feels unfair when your friends are allowed and you’re not.” This validates her without giving in. 2. Be open and honest about your reasoning Kids don’t need every detail, but they do appreciate being in the loop. Try: “My job is to look out for you, even when it’s hard. I’m not trying to stop you from having fun — I’m trying to make sure you’re safe and happy in the long run.” You can even admit it’s not always easy: “Honestly, I don’t like saying no to you. I know it’s tough.” 3. Shift from “no” to “not yet” or “let’s find a way together” It feels less like a brick wall and more like a conversation. Try: “I’m not saying never — just not right now. Let’s talk about what needs to be in place for me to feel more confident about it.” This could include things like maturity, safety settings, screen time limits, or emotional readiness. 4. Offer alternatives that still meet her need If she’s craving connection, creativity, or status — find other ways to support that. Example: “You love creating videos — maybe we could do something together with that offline or with a smaller group of friends in a safer space.” 5. Make it about values, not control Frame your parenting around values like confidence, self-respect, safety, and balance. Say: “I’m trying to help you become someone who’s strong, thoughtful, and true to herself — not just someone who follows the crowd.” 6. Play the long game They may roll their eyes now, but down the line, many kids say they respected the boundaries — especially when parents kept communication open and respectful. How to Say No Without Being the Villain For those moments when you’re setting a boundary, -and it feels like you’re crushing their world SCRIPTS 👂 Step 1: Acknowledge Their Feelings “I can tell this really matters to you. I know how much you enjoy it, and I get that it feels unfair when your friends are allowed and you’re not.” 🧠 Why? Validates their feelings, which builds trust and keeps the door open for conversation. 💬 Step 2: Be Honest About Your Reasoning “My job is to keep you safe and help you grow into someone confident and happy — even if that means making hard calls.” “I’m not saying no to hurt you. I’m doing it because I care more about you than what’s easy.” 🧠 Why? Kids are more likely to accept limits if they understand the “why.” 🕒 Step 3: Reframe It as “Not Yet” or “Let’s Explore Together” “I’m not saying never — just not yet. Let’s keep talking about this and work out what would help us both feel more comfortable.” “Maybe we can revisit this in a few months and see how things are going.” 🧠 Why? “Not yet” feels fairer and more hopeful than “no.” 🧩 Step 4: Offer an Alternative That Meets the Same Need If she’s drawn to connection → “What about inviting a few friends round instead this weekend? You could have a mini screen-free hangout or movie night.” If she’s feeling left out → “Let’s come up with something you can do that feels special and fun, just for you.” 🧠 Why? It shows you’re not trying to take away joy, just guiding it safely. 💖 Step 5: End With a Value-Based Statement “Our family values kindness, courage, and balance. I want you to grow up trusting your gut — not just going along with what everyone else is doing.” “Sometimes, saying no is part of helping you become the amazing person you’re meant to be.” 🧠 Why? Kids need to know there’s a bigger picture — and that they’re part of it.
From Baby Bottles to Brand Loyalty: Is Big Tech Marketing to Your Baby?
Marketing to babies and toddlers is a growing concern, especially in today’s tech-driven world. The marketing industry has increasingly turned its focus to the youngest consumers, making them targets for everything from toys to digital devices, often before they can even speak or make decisions for themselves. Here’s how this trend plays out, why it’s troubling, and what you as a parent need to know. 📊 The Rise of Targeting Babies and Toddlers In recent years, companies have ramped up their marketing strategies to reach the parents of babies and toddlers. While this may sound innocent at first—promoting educational toys or products that help with early development—there’s an increasing amount of marketing that is pushing products and experiences aimed at babies, toddlers, and young children as a way to create long-lasting brand loyalty. Baby Tech Tech companies have jumped on this bandwagon by marketing tech products such as smart baby monitors, app-driven toys, and even baby-friendly tablets. This isn’t just about convenience for parents. Some companies claim these devices can help babies learn quicker or be more connected to their parents through technology. But this raises serious concerns about how early tech exposure impacts early brain development. Influence of “Mommy Blogs” and Social Media Mothers and fathers are often targeted on platforms like Instagram and Pinterest, where “mommy influencers” show off the latest products for their babies—ranging from organic baby food to $300 strollers. These influencers unintentionally become part of the marketing machine, promoting products that aren’t always necessary or beneficial for a child’s well-being. And this is amplified by algorithms that keep showing them more products, making parents feel like they need these things for their children to thrive. Branding the Baby Some brands have even gone so far as to create entire “personalities” for babies. Infants are marketed with specific traits like “the sporty one” or “the curious one,” turning them into little consumers before they’ve even had the chance to explore their own identities. This leads to kids being influenced at a much younger age to develop specific tastes and desires based on brand marketing rather than their own organic interests. 😨 Why Parents Should Be Concerned Early Tech Exposure:Research shows that exposure to screens and tech at an early age can hinder development. Babies’ brains are rapidly developing in their early years, and the interactions they have with their environment, caregivers, and physical play are critical. Studies suggest that passive screen time can delay language development and interfere with social skills. The earlier children are exposed to tech, the harder it is for them to disconnect when needed later in life. Consumerism Before Consciousness:When babies and toddlers are marketed to, they’re not yet in a position to make informed choices about what they want or need. This marketing often leads parents to believe they need products to ensure their child is getting the best start in life—sometimes leading to overspending on things that aren’t truly necessary. Babies are often marketed toys or products as “educational” when they might actually be more about creating brand loyalty from an early age. Parental Pressure:The constant stream of “must-have” products can cause parents to feel immense pressure. Parents may feel that they need to buy the latest tech gadgets, clothes, or toys to keep up with the trends. This also creates a cycle of stress, as parents may start comparing their lives to curated influencer content, leading to self-doubt and consumer guilt. Brand Loyalty Formed Too Early:By the time children are toddlers, brands have already started to shape their desires. The influence of logo recognition, advertising jingles, and character-based branding starts to take root very early. This creates a powerful brand loyalty that’s hard to break, making it difficult for children to make decisions based on personal taste or practicality as they grow older. 👨👩👧👦 What Parents Can Do Limit Screen Time for Babies and Toddlers:Follow the guidance from experts such as the American Academy of Pediatrics, which recommends no screen time for babies under 18 months, except for video chats. For toddlers, screen time should be limited to one hour per day with educational content, and it’s important to watch it together to provide context and interaction. Focus on Developmentally Appropriate Play:Instead of focusing on “high-tech” toys, prioritize age-appropriate, hands-on toys that encourage creativity and physical play. Building blocks, sensory toys, and outdoor activities can stimulate your child’s development in a much healthier way. Be a Critical Consumer:Parents should be wary of marketing tactics that target them through influencers or social media ads. Ask yourself if the product being marketed truly benefits your child’s well-being or if it’s just another trend designed to make you feel like you need it. Encourage Active Engagement:Engage with your child in ways that build their emotional, cognitive, and physical skills. Reading books, singing songs, and having meaningful interactions without digital distractions are critical for healthy development. Model Healthy Tech Use:As your child grows, model how to use technology mindfully. Show them that tech is a tool, not a crutch, and emphasize the importance of balance—ensuring that outdoor play, family time, and real-world interactions are prioritized. 🔍 Final Thoughts While it’s impossible to completely shield children from the digital world, we can take steps to limit their exposure and teach them to navigate it thoughtfully. By being critical consumers and focusing on the development of our kids rather than jumping into the latest tech trends, we can help preserve their innocence and encourage healthy growth. As parents, it’s our job to keep Big Tech in check, making sure it doesn’t define who our kids are or who they become. Questions to Ponder for Parents: Is this product truly necessary for my child’s development, or is it just a clever marketing gimmick? How much screen time is appropriate for my baby or toddler, and how can I create healthy boundaries? Am I allowing my child to form brand loyalty before they are old enough to make independent choices? How do I ensure my child’s
Too Young for Toner? ‘Sephora Kids’ And How Big Tech & Beauty Brands Are Luring Young Kids Into Skincare
Trying to be like a mum Credit: Freepik Have you heard the buzz about “Sephora Kids”? Yes, we’re talking about 8-year-old girls — still in primary school — flocking to beauty shops, clutching colourful serums, eye creams, and retinol-infused lotions. And no, they’re not shopping for mum! Now, I’m all for a bit of self-care — a warm bath, a gentle cleanser, a dab of suncream — but when children as young as eight are being swept up into a grown-up world of skincare routines and beauty marketing, it’s time to pause and reflect. So, should we be worried? I believe we should be — and here’s why. 💻 How Big Tech & Beauty Brands Are Luring Young Kids Into Skincare It’s not an accident. It’s a strategy. Big Tech platforms — especially TikTok, YouTube Shorts, and Instagram — are fertile ground for beauty marketing aimed at younger and younger audiences. Here’s how they’re doing it: 📱 1. The Algorithm Loves a Trend Once a child watches one “Get Ready With Me” (#GRWM) video or skincare haul, their feed becomes saturated with more of the same. These aren’t innocent skincare routines — they’re sophisticated advertorials in disguise, often by influencers twice the age of the child watching. 🛍️ 2. Influencers as Trusted Friends Young children don’t always know the difference between a recommendation and an ad. Big Tech and beauty brands know this. That’s why influencer deals, paid partnerships, and unboxings are so popular — they sell products wrapped in trust. 🧠 3. Fear-Based Messaging Even 8-year-olds are being exposed to ideas like “you’ll get wrinkles,” “your pores aren’t clean,” or “you’re not glowing enough.” It’s grooming a generation to feel not good enough — unless they buy something. 👀 4. #SephoraKids Is A Marketing Goldmine Big brands are watching. They see that primary school girls are fascinated by routines and rituals. So they design packaging, store displays, and products to feel like toys — colourful, scented, playful — but with grown-up price tags and ingredients their skin doesn’t need. 📊 5. Data-Driven Manipulation Big Tech knows exactly what your child is searching, watching, and liking — and serves up beauty content based on it. It’s not a coincidence your daughter is suddenly “obsessed” with serums. It’s by design. The Tenderness of Childhood Skin Children’s skin isn’t mini-adult skin. It’s thinner, more sensitive, still developing. Many of the popular skincare products found in influencer-led “routines” — like exfoliating acids, retinols, and firming creams — are not just unnecessary for young skin, they can be harmful. Think rashes, burns, allergies. Are we replacing childhood with chemicals in the name of self-care? When Skincare Becomes A Mask For some little girls, skincare isn’t really about care — it’s about fixing themselves. That’s a hard pill to swallow. I’ve worked with families for decades, and I know this: once the seeds of “not enough” are planted, they grow fast. Are we teaching our daughters that their natural skin needs fixing at eight? Are we unknowingly handing them anti-wrinkle creams instead of confidence? Whose Voice Are They Listening To? Many of these young girls are being influenced by TikTok, YouTube, and social media trends — where 20-somethings peddle 10-step nighttime routines and where the algorithm whispers, “You’ll feel better if you just buy this.” Who’s shaping your child’s self-image — you or the internet? Is that skincare haul really about caring… or comparing? The Commercialisation of Childhood Let’s call it what it is. The beauty industry sees our children as customers. That should make us deeply uncomfortable. The earlier the hook, the longer the lifetime spend. Are we okay with corporations mining childhood for profit? Should children be the next frontier of the beauty business? What Can We Do as Parents? Keep conversations open. Ask your child why they want skincare products — don’t dismiss their feelings, but explore what’s behind them. Help them build routines based on health, not image. Encourage time outdoors, creative play, and screen breaks to remind them there’s a world beyond mirrors and marketing. Be mindful of our own habits. What are we modelling in our own relationship with appearance? A Loving Reminder This isn’t about shame or blame. We’re parenting in a world that moves faster than ever — a world where childhood is being edited, filtered, and sold back to us in tiny bottles with glittery labels. Let’s slow it down. Let’s protect the innocence of childhood — not wrap it in serums. Because the truth is, the most powerful “skincare” we can offer our girls is the glow that comes from being seen, celebrated, and loved just as they are. 🌿 Conversation Scripts: Talking to Your Child About Skincare and Self-Worth 👩👧 1. When Your Child Asks for Skincare Products You could say:“That’s interesting — what made you want that serum/cream? Is it something you saw online or at school?”(Pause and listen)“You know, our skin at your age is still learning and growing — it doesn’t need all those ingredients just yet. What matters most is keeping it healthy and clean. How about we look at some gentle, fun things we can do together?” 🪄 Why it works: This script keeps the tone light and curious. It invites your child to reflect on the ‘why’ without making them feel silly or shut down. 📱 2. When You Notice They’re Copying a Social Media Skincare Trend You could say:“I noticed you’ve been talking about routines and products — have you seen those on TikTok or YouTube?”(Listen, don’t judge)“Some of those people are much older, and the products they use might not be safe or needed for young skin. Let’s chat about what real self-care means at your age. What do you think makes you feel good and cared for?” 🌱 Why it works: It opens the door to conversations about influence, age-appropriateness, and self-care beyond appearance. 🪞 3. When They Say They Don’t Like Their Skin or Appearance You could say:“I’m so sorry you’re feeling that
Navigating the Digital Jungle in Blended Families: Challenges, Solutions & Conversation Starters
Blending families is a journey filled with love, patience, and, at times, unexpected challenges. In today’s digital world, stepfamilies face unique hurdles when it comes to managing screen time, setting boundaries, and fostering healthy online habits. Unlike other family units, where routines may be well-established blended families often have to navigate differing parenting styles, house rules, and expectations when it comes to technology. So, how can blended families successfully find their way through the digital jungle without it becoming a battleground? Here, I explore key challenges and offer practical solutions, along with conversation starters to help ease tensions and create a sense of unity. Challenges of Digital Parenting in Stepfamilies 1. Differing Parenting Approaches to Tech One parent may be relaxed about screen time, while the other has stricter rules. Add in different expectations from biological parents in separate households, and suddenly, consistency feels impossible. Solution:Agree on a “House Digital Agreement”—a simple, written set of family tech rules that apply in your shared home. Involve the children in creating it so they feel heard and respected. It’s okay if different homes have different rules, but clarity within your household reduces confusion. Conversation Starter:“I know different families have different rules about screen time. In our home, I’d love for us to agree together on what feels fair and works for everyone. What do you think would be a good starting point?” 2. “They Get to Do It at Mum’s/Dad’s House!” It’s common for children to push boundaries by comparing rules in different households. “At Mum’s, I can stay up playing Fortnite!” or “At Dad’s, I don’t have to put my phone away at dinner!” can lead to frustration and resentment. Solution:Instead of focusing on what happens elsewhere, frame rules as a reflection of what matters in your home. Consistency and predictability provide security, even if they resist at first. Conversation Starter:“I understand that things might be different at your other home, and that’s okay. But in our house, we have this rule because we want to [protect sleep/have time together/keep everyone safe]. Let’s figure out how to make it work for you too.” 3. Managing Social Media & Group Chats Step-siblings, half-siblings, household siblings and other blended family relationship may feel pressure to ‘perform’ in blended family settings, which can spill into social media. Teenagers especially may struggle with how to present their new family dynamic online, or how to handle group chats where tensions between households can arise. Solution:Talk openly about the pressures of social media and reassure children that they don’t need to post or share anything they’re uncomfortable with. Encourage house siblings to set healthy boundaries in family group chats—no pressure to reply instantly, no shaming or teasing, and respect for privacy. Conversation Starter:“Social media can sometimes make family relationships feel more complicated. How do you feel about posting things about our family? No pressure either way, but we can chat if anything ever feels tricky.” 4. Gaming & Bonding—or Dividing? Video games can be a fantastic way for house siblings to bond, but they can also become a source of tension—especially if some children feel left out or if gaming time is causing conflict. Solution:Encourage games that can be played together and set up fair screen time rules so no one feels left out. If gaming is a sticking point, plan screen-free bonding activities too, like board games or family outings. Conversation Starter:“I love that you guys enjoy gaming together! How about we pick a game everyone can join in with this weekend? And if someone doesn’t feel like playing, that’s okay too—let’s find other fun things to do together as well.” 5. Screen Time as an Escape from Emotions Children in blended families may use screens as a way to avoid difficult emotions—whether that’s adjusting to a new routine, dealing with change, or navigating relationships in a blended household. Solution:Create natural opportunities for open conversations and connection without forcing them. Simple rituals like tech-free meal times or a ‘walk and talk’ tradition can help kids feel safe to share when they’re ready. Conversation Starter:“I’ve noticed you’ve been spending a bit more time on your phone lately—no judgement, but I just wanted to check in. Is there anything on your mind? I’m here if you ever want to chat.” Final Thoughts: Tech as a Tool for Connection Technology doesn’t have to be a source of division in blended families—it can also be a powerful way to connect. Watching a series together, sharing funny memes, or even playing a co-op game can help strengthen relationships. The key is balance, mutual respect, and open conversations. By establishing fair and flexible digital boundaries together, blended families can turn the digital jungle into a shared adventure, rather than a battleground. Download ‘Our House Digital Agreement‘ Why not create a ‘House Family Digital Agreement’ together? A fun way to do this is by writing five simple tech agreements and signing them as a family. This could include: ✔️ No phones at mealtimes✔️ One screen-free activity together each week✔️ Respect for personal screen space and privacy✔️ Open conversations if something feels wrong online✔️ Remembering that technology should bring us together, not push us apart The digital world is here to stay, but with thoughtful discussions and shared agreements, blended families can navigate it with confidence and connection. If you need help about creating one or are unsure about what to say to your family, I have created ‘Our House Digital Agreement‘ for Blended Families download. Download it here
